I've taken the opportunity to post this letter on my blog since there are those of you out there, and you know who you are, who are all for comments but are too quick to censor out any that you don't like. Having tried to communicate with you reasonably, I am choosing to post this on my blog where I know I will have a chance to express myself freely.
I don't hate you. I don't care what you think, I really don't. And that's possibly because I really don't care what you think. I believe that every person is entitled to their opinion and should be free from coercion from others. You want to believe, or more specifically, not to believe? Go right ahead. As I told you when you first started up your blog, I'm not interested in changing your mind. I'm not interested in harming you, causing you psychological distress, judge you, ostracize you or shut your blog down.
I have not sent you hate mail. In fact, any mail I sent you was in reply to letters you sent me first and the only thing is the replies were responses or rebuttals to points you raised. Specifically: I did not call you Hitler. I did not demand you accept my opinions. And the one time you perceived that I had offended you, I offered my apologies without rationlizations.
The only mistake I really made was assuming you were interesting in having an intelligent discussion. Clearly you're interested in publishing your views to the entire world (that's what a blog is, after all) but differing feedback is not something you're ready to accept. Well here's the first lession of blogging: Either you take all comers or turn off your comments option.
If anyone has been using personal insults, foul language and baseless accusations, it's you. If anyone has gone out their way to misrepresent the other in this discussion, it's you. I don't feel I've suffered at God's hands. In fact, I think I've been overrewarded by the Big Guy Upstairs. That's why I'm happy to debate those who would deny His existence.
But debate isn't something you're interested in. Just screaming at others and then claiming they're screaming at you.
Clearly you're had a rough life. You've gone through significant changes, you have obvious psychological trauma in background that needs to be dealt with. I've really tried to be understanding of that. Your public swearing at me and blaming me for all manner of ridiculous ills you claim to have suffered is clear evidence of that.
But you're a fellow Jew. God says I must respect and care about you so I shall. I forgive you your impetuousness and rudeness because I don't think you're were trying to be malicious. You really do think you're under attack even though you're not so it's no wonder you're reacting like you do.
I have some simple advice: Get help. Learn how to interact with others and how to interpret challenges to your beliefs without automatically putting up your shields. It's essential for your survival, especially in the secular world.
Good luch and may God watch over you until you come home.